Why I HATE Sex

Good morning world, let me let you in on a secret; I hate sex. Now don't get me wrong, I love having sex, but I just hate writing sex scenes.  I can write any scene from a seriously emotional scene

Rolling over in bed I reached for him, but I forgot that he was gone until I felt that his side of the bed was cold.  Fighting back the tears that were forcing their way into my eyes I grabbed the pillow that once held his head, sniffing it, trying to remember his natural scent.  Needing a piece of what was once mine until someone took him away from me and from this world forever.  I missed him so deeply, I would trade my soul just for the chance to hold him once more.  If God himself came to me and ask for my first born child in for a chance to taste his lips I would sign on the dotted line.  My bed lay empty, but my heart was still full; I can't believe that it had been a month since he was killed, but my own death was slow and painful as I was forced to live alone without the man I vowed to love for the rest of my life. 

To a funny scene:

Watching as my husband struggled putting the ceiling fan up by himself after my offers of help were rejected.  As he lifted the heavy fan above his head, I sensed imminent danger as his feet wobbled on the unstable ladder that he found in the garage.  "Honey let me at least hold the ladder." I offered.

"No Sheila, I told you that I can do this on my own." he rejected again.

As my mechanically challenged husband tried lifting the fan once again he lost his footing, the look of fear was written all over his face as I tried getting to him to help ease the fall it felt as if my feet were stuck in sand.  Watching as the ceiling fan, the ladder and my poor husband came crashing onto the floor with a heavy thud I couldn't help but laugh out loud.  He lay there entangled in the yellow ladder and ceiling fan and moaned, "Damn, I think I dropped a screw."

"Honey I think the screw should be the least of your worries." I laughed as I grabbed the cell phone and began dialing my brother's number for help, which I should have done in the first place.

Hell I can even write a decent murder scene:

His eyes were as cold as the air that whipped around our bodies as he lunged towards me with the long, sharp knife pointed directly at my heart.  Dodging him, he slipped on a piece of ice, lost his balance and dropped the knife. Acting quickly I dove for the weapon, slipping myself I barely missed landing on top of my assailant as I came crashing down upon the ground.   Two sets of eyes, riddled with fear looked at the knife as two sets of hands and legs kicked and clawed at each other as we fought to regain control on the slippery ice, trying to get to the blade.   The attacker grabbed at my sprawling legs as I attempted to crawl toward the shiny knife which was almost within arms reach, I could hear him struggle to grab me, but the pain in his knee kept him from success as I grabbed the blade in my right hand.  My boot landed hard on his face sending him falling to left side he let out a loud moan.  Regaining my balance I stood and walked towards him as he lay on the ground, but he was persistent, never giving up as he tried to grab at my ankles with his gloved hands.  Knowing that he would never give up until one of us lay in the mortuary I plunged the long, steel blade deep into his chest as he clawed at my face and neck with his gloved hands.  The look in his eyes told me that he was fighting with a painful death, but I dug the knife deeper in his body until he lay limp on the cold ground.  

But sex is what I struggle with.  I had a friend once ask me, "How can a person who obviously loves having sex and knows how to have sex judging by your six kids, not know how to write sex scenes?"  Great question friend, but sorry having sex and writing about sex are two totally different things.  When I sit down to write a sex scene I go blank so I visit one of my favorite free porn sites (the name I will not disclose) and try to formulate words with what is on screen.  The only thing about that is most porn sex is hardcore, rough and rugged sex with no passion or feeling between the two people.  Perfect for a rape scene, but not for an intimate scene between two people who are not being paid to screw.  Since my husband and I love each other and have a pretty decent sex life I close my eyes and remember our last tryst.  Easier said than done since most of our sex is rushed because we have to find time and places to have sex with six kids running around. Putting our sex into words is perfect if I'm writing about two tired and stressed out parents of six children trying to have sex.  

I've read most of Zane's books and her sex scenes are so vivid that I need a hot towel and a glass of ice water afterwards.  In Eric Jerome Dickey's book, Pleasure, the sex scenes were...well....wow.  That is a book that I need my man lying right beside me when I put it down. My sex scence are okay, but they are lacking something and I'm not sure how I can get them to pop an take my readers from reading to masturbation.

Well it is back to the drawing board for me, but for your reading pleasure here is a sex scene from my up-comng book, Skeletons.  Enjoy.

Tabitha took that as a cue to send me overboard and covered my pussy with her soft lips and sucked until my body was overcome with so much pleasure that I called out to God in Spanish and English, tearing the sheets away from the bed while my legs tightened, vibrated then fell limp.  Tabitha crawled her way back up my trembling body, my juices still fresh on her full lips,  wearing a mischievous smile on her face.