Terms & Conditions Of The Relationship Contract

Hello.  Last night I watched The Time Traveler's Wife and while this movie was fantastic , I felt sorry for Claire (played by Rachel McAdams) because she couldn't fully live her life due to the fact that she was constantly waiting for Henry (played by Eric Bana) to travel back to her.  At one point in the movie she was resentful of him because while he was traveling through time, she had bills to pay and a life to live and she wanted to live a normal life with a man who stayed in the present time with her.  Yet, she entered into this agreement with Henry so waiting for him to time travel to get back to her were the terms and conditions of her relationship contract.

Read Carefully Before You Sign On The Dotted Line

When Henry told her that he traveled through time and that he couldn't control it nor did he know when in time or where in time that he would travel.  The terms and conditions of their relationship meant that there would be days, weeks, months or years that Claire would be without him. Waiting on him to return. Once Claire signed on the dotted line of that relationship contract that meant that she agreed to the terms and conditions.  

When we enter into a new relationship we tend to get so caught up in the newness of it all that we look past the important things.  Important things such as, is he employed, does he have children, does he use drugs, does he have a drinking problem, is she already married but separated  does she have several children by several different men or has she completed high school or in Claire's case can he stick around? When entering into a relationship and the newness wears off that is when it is time to take a look at the terms and conditions of your potential mate and if those terms and conditions are conducive with your life.  This should be done before you sign on the dotted line of the relationship contract and become exclusive with that person.  For example, if you don't have children, don't like children, have expensive furniture in your home and like to travel to exotic lands at the drop of a dime,  would it be conducive with your life to enter into a relationship with a person who has three children?  No.  Another example, if you are a member of C.O.G.I.G (Church Of God In Christ) who goes to church Sunday thru Friday would it be conducive with your life to get with someone who is a partier? No.  Entering into these contracts with people who don't fit into the major parts of your life is the set up for a disastrous union.
Some people enter into non-conducive relationship contracts because they think that they can deal with their partners terms & conditions or they think that the partner will eventually change.  That is fine, but it rarely happens.  Remember people change for their own needs and they change on their own time so if you want to wait around for someone to change, you may be waiting a lifetime.

Contract Addendum

 Say you enter into the relationship contract under the terms & conditions that your mate does not do housework then sometime down the line you are working more hours, you have a few kids and you need help around the house your partner is going to be hesitant and may refuse to help because his terms & conditions have not changed and since you signed on the dotted line you are in a losing situation.   That is when you have changed the contract by adding an addendum that since your mate can't afford to let you stay home and care for the house and kids then he will have to accommodate for your absence by doing housework.  Keep in mind that adding a contract addendum does not guarantee that your mate will agree so you will have to keep the negotiations open until the terms & conditions of the relationship are mutually agreed upon by both parties.  Say for instance that your mate will hire a part-time house keeper to help out. You can't add an addendum without your partner's knowledge and without your partner agreeing with the changed contract, if you do then that is a breech of contract.

Breeching The Contracts Deems It Null & Void

When some fails to honor the terms & conditions of their mutually agreed upon contract then they are in breech of contract making that contract null and void.  Long hours have been spent in court houses across the world due to breech of contract cases so this is an important issue.  Business partnerships have ended due to breech on contracts and the same thing goes for relationship contracts.  When you accept the terms and conditions of your relationship with the partner of your choice then to that partner you will accept their bullshit and you can't question it nor disagree with it because, "I was like this when you met me" or "You knew that I didn't have my GED when you met me" or "You know that I slept with your brother when we met".  Therefore you can't bring that shit up and if you do then that makes the relationship contract null and void and the relationship will ultimately be null and void as well. 

Remember when entering into a relationship read over their terms and conditions and if those things are not conducive with your life and/or life's goals do not enter into the contract in the first place and save yourself the grief in the long run. 

TTFN!